Swear to God

Plot:

Sam is in the middle of picking up an attractive woman named Suzanne in the bar, when he's called by another former lover named Denise who wants to see him as soon as possible. So many women, so little time. He chooses to see Denise, while he puts current prey, Suzanne, on hold. However Denise doesn't quite want a liaison: she tells Sam that he is one of two possible men who fathered her newborn child. Sam is shaken at the news, and swears to God that he will forgo sex forever if the child isn't his. Well actually, he changes that to three months, which is like a lifetime for Sam. He quickly finds out that he is not the father, and is relieved. He is just about ready to head off for an evening of debauchery with Suzanne when Carla reminds him of his vow to God. Because of Carla's strong Catholic background, she convinces Sam, with a little help from Woody dressed as Moses, that a vow to God is something one should not take lightly. Besides Carla, Sam asks for advice from Father Barry and Frasier, the former who won't let Sam off the hook, and the latter who suggests he funnel his sexual energies into other endeavors, such as learning to play the piano. It doesn't help that another old flame, Rachel Patterson, comes by the bar on a short layover she has in Boston. Weak Sam eventually breaks and heads off with Rachel. However, he comes back into the bar a changed man: he was about ready to do the deed with Rachel in a hotel room when all of a sudden he noticed a Bible in the nightstand. They switch hotels and Sam notices the same Bible in the next hotel room and the next. According to Sam, it must be a sign from God. Just as Frasier is about to set him straight on Bibles in hotel rooms, he is stopped by Carla, who wants Sam to live up to his vow to God. They let Sam live with his misconception. Sam's made it through this episode with Rachel, but it's going to be a long three months with a lot of piano playing.